In the wake of Chris Brown’s recent beating of girlfriend/popstar Rihanna, Brown’s long-time record label, Zomba, has decided to pull the plug on his greatest hits album that was slated to be released later this month.

“Chris chose an untimely time to beat his girlfriend,” said Art Phillips, spokes person of Zomba Records.  “We’ve had the album prepped for a couple of months, just hit after hit after hit, the type of strong, in-your-face-music, that dealing with love and relationships is all about, but unfortunately, even the intern that can only breathe through his mouth said that now is the wrong time to release a CD titled Chris Brown’s Greatest Hits.”

The whole situation is a shame because he has recently been nominated in the same category as Rihanna in the upcoming Nickelodeon kids choice awards and was quoted as saying “I want to beat her,” about the situation, before having the Public Relations savvy to withdraw himself from consideration.

Brown decided pulling himself from the ballots of Nickelodeon’s Kid Choice award was best, something that the Viacom Network didn’t think to do itself, until Brown reminded them that it may send the wrong message to kids if he was honored for anything only weeks after he punched his young girlfriend multiple times in the face with his “good knuckles”, and bit her hands and fingers, then threatened to kill her, even if he got slimed at the end of his acceptance speech and said that he beating was only a good joke gone bad.

Some celebrities are still selfishly pulling for Brown, in order to get a little extra attention and a spot on Ellen, a daytime talk show hosted by one of the few celebrities that could actually beat her own wife.

Sean “Puffy” Combs, rapper/relationship counselor, recently appeared on said talk show to defend the lending of his house to Chris and Rihanna, saying something along the lines of, “The best way to work through a tough spell [read: beating the fuck out of a woman and threatening to fucking kill her] in a young relationship is alone time in my house and jet skis.”

Regardless of his supporters, possible felon Brown will have to wait to be found innocent, or strike a great plea bargain like the rest of the rich, before he can focus on the release another album.  Lets hope that by then the vocoder has lost its fashion, T-Pain has killed himself with a gun for an MTV special, Lil’ Wayne’s syrup addiction keeps him out of the studio, and Will.i.am is no longer considered a political pundit, and is also dead, ‘cause fuck him and that transvestite he rode in on.

Unfortunately, the track list from Brown’s not to be released album reads like a five-star opus and features a plethora of guest stars, such as known wife beater Ike Turner, sexual assaulter Tupac Shakur, the entire Saudi Arabia Men’s choir, and ad-libs from the guy that played Cody on 90’s sit com “Step by Step”.

As of press time Rihanna had no comment, probably because her jaw is wired shut and she has been busy trying to win Chris back.

We here at the Truant find nothing funny about domestic violence but we’ve been cranking seminal hit “Let’s Get Physical” made popular by Olivia Newton John and giggling to ourselves for oh, about…ten days now.

/additional reporting by Nixon Dickhouse