The Truant helps community and furry friends
We at The Truant pride ourselves in our unbiased and fearless reporting on the issues that affect the world we live in from both the national and international stage. With a scope so broad our readers may think it would be easy for us to forget about the small things in life, the small things that matter on our local Main Street, not just with the corporate big-wigs on Wall Street. Not so. Today at the offices of The Truant two unexpected, furry and four-legged visitors wandered in through the open front door and if they are not claimed by the end of the week they will be put down.
They appear to be full blooded, yet slightly inbred puppies which we have dubbed “Cesar” and “Cicero”, after our two favorite salad dressings. They both appear to have collars, one collar red and the other blue, each with some numbers and letters engraved on the attached tags. We haven’t read exactly what the tags say because we have grown quite fond of the names which we have given to the pups and don’t yet want to change them.
They have been given a cubical to live their final week in, filling the vacant spot of our recently confiscated head writer, who was also an animal. They seem to be taking well to their new environment, although Cicero got stuck/put in the copy machine yesterday evening and hasn’t been able to get out.
As a staff we have made adjustments and taken time to train the puppies to behave like humans, even though they have been the major proprietors of the shit smell that has plagued the office since they arrived, mostly, but not completely, because their shit is everywhere and the office petty cash was spent on a fleet of wheelchairs so the staff wouldn’t have to walk anymore, instead of using it to buy a spade. Also, knowing that the dogs won’t be around that long, we can’t really justify a chipping in on a garden tool that no one really knows how to use anyway.
We figure that at the end of the week we will either have a lottery or draw straws to see who gets to be the lucky staffer to pull the trigger or toss the plastic bag in to the river, although ever since the wars, killing has been in Chennault’s blood and he is playing up the trump card that “it’s going to happen sooner than later, and better a puppy than a person,” so we’ll probably just let him shoot the curs with his German Luger.
They both can double as a good blanket But Maynard is the superior blanket IMO
I ,as a rule, don’t leave comments!!! Believe me! But I liked your web site…especially this post! Would you mind terribly if I threw up a backlink from my blog site to your blog site?
[...] story, was a little hesitant to comment at first, but when we told her that we also write about puppies she loosened [...]
Now you’ve done it. You are going to have all the PETA and animal huggin’ hippies this side of Elko so far up your corn-holes that they will be able to tell you what you’re eating before it is fully in your mouths.