Reichsmarschall Lordy Tremain has caused a truly disgusting watercolor painting to be displayed in main offices of The Truant, to the horror of the rest of the editorial board, not to mention the art world.
A Brinks truck arrived at nine a.m. on Monday and six off-duty Los Angeles Police officers offloaded the small, unmarked...
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President Barack Obama was peppered with criticism today shortly after wrapping up a speech on foreign relations at Utah State University, where he explained to students and media that the Chinese “are a lot like the Borg on Star Trek.”
Obama, who was replying to...
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Ed.–As reported to Lordy Tremain, Reichsmarschall, by Devon Foxblade, Salt Lake City Attaché
The controversial film, 8: The Mormon Proposition, received a standing ovation followed by cries of “No homo” after its premiere screening in Park City’s Sundance Film Festival this week. Director G.B. Sillyfuck’s...
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Early this morning local drunk driver Andrew Duke attempted to drive himself home while intoxicated from a friend’s house after a night of hard drinking, but had to pull over after a few miles because he was too drunk to drive.
“Yeah, I don’t know...
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In an attempt raise awareness of the starving people in Haiti, ground-breaking television news magazine The Truant, held a giant feast at the local country club and invited much if its staff and a handful local politicians.
Being that it was early in the year...
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President Obama continued to attempt to stoke the United States economy today by extending unemployment benefits to individuals who lost their jobs by being utter shitheads at work.
“I think if we give these people who were acting like retards at work and got fired...
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Ed. Note: We asked Paul Mero, head of the Sutherland Institute: the leading conservative think-tank in Utah, who usually contributes his Mero Moment over @ kvnuftp.com. This week he had something a bit edgier than his usual contribution and we were delighted he chose to contribute.
I’ve...
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In a hilarious case of mistaken infidelity, Jude Christensen, a senior at the University of Utah, accidentally had sex with a woman that was not his girlfriend, but, according to sources close to Jude, still got his nut.
Christensen and his girlfriend were attending...
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When we last left our local periodical, the Herald Journal was taking nominations for a Resident of the Year award, and the good people of Logan, America were using the opportunity to nominate their child’s dance instructor. Earlier this week, the HJ’s Letters to...
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